The world's premiere psychic, astrologist, and rumpologist--Jackie Stallone--predicts that retired White House reporter Helen Thomas "really" needs a makeover.
"Get with it, Helen," Jackie confides. "The Witchiepoo look ain't working. Glamour is a gal's best friend. Look at me. Let's chop off at least half of that nose. Nip and tuck the jowls. Give the clown makeup back to Bozo. And a comb would be nice. Old can be hot if you work it right."
"Jackie Stallone will never be mistaken for Jackie Kennedy, maybe Edgar Kennedy," shot back Thomas. "I should take beauty advice from her? Look in the mirror, if you have one that isn't cracked. Who redid your lips? Goodyear? Stick to rumpology, whatever the hell that is. I look cute."
"Look, Pickle-Puss, don't start in with me," Jackie cracked. "I'll send Sly and Frank over to beat your pruney ass."
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