Friday, August 10, 2012

Jackie Stallone Predicts Pisces Romney Will Win

World-famous astrologer and psychic Jackie Stallone has consulted the stars and learned that Mitt Romney will win the election in November.

"I'm 100% positive Mitt's the man," revealed the author of "Starpower," a detailed and authoritative guide to the zodiac.  "I did Mitt's chart, and victory is in the stars.  I back that up as Dean of the University of Astrology and as America's foremost rumpologist."

Dean Jackie added, "And stop saying I look like Carrot Top.  It ain't funny."

When told Jackie Stallone is predicting his victory at the polls, Romney replied, "Who?"

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