Obama: I'm Having Affair With Betty White

Admitting to a weakness for "wrinkled, old white ladies," President Obama today revealed his long-running affair with Golden Girl Betty White.

"I guess Betty reminds me of my grandmother, the white one," said Obama.  "She's sort of a white mammy.  Betty's been my strange since I was in the Senate.  I can't love just one woman.  I'm a rolling stone like my father.  He couldn't settle down with my mother.  I can't just poke Michelle."

"Barack's no Mandingo, but he sure beats the hell out of Allen Ludden," said White, winking .  "The password is lust."

The lovers will campaign together, hitting swing states with large populations of the elderly.

"The ladies out there know what I'm talking about," purred White.  "Once you've had Barack, you don't go back.  Four more years in the sack!"

Before hooking up with White, Barack had affairs with Bea Arthur, Clara Peller, and Irene Ryan.



Presidential paramour, Clara Peller